OK: I need some help with this. . . .

For several weeks now, Dwight, the guy I've been "dating" is surprising me and showing up on Thursday night (last night was the 3rd in a row) and he wanted me to go with him today (today being Friday, 8 October) back with him to school for their homecoming weekend. . .

I am posting this since he is in lab right now and I am in his dorm room reflecting one WTF is going on!!!

It's not that I don't like Dwight. I really, really do. In fact, I probably lack his as well, if not better, than any person I've ever really known. He is sort of goofy, but in a really nice way. He is talented--he plays several musical instruments and has a passable voice. He is smart; he is sure to be Dean's list for his first term. He is tolerant of me and my idiosyncrasies (as witnessed by this rambling post).

So why am I writing about this issue--why do I seem to be sounding like some ungrateful bitch concerning this really sweet guy who just happened into my like?

Part of it is that Dwight keeps telling me he loves me. . .now I know there are some of you out there who will immediately say that, indeed, I am one petty bitch who does not know how good she has it. But please note, before you rush to judgment of me, some of these facts:

• Dwight and I are only 18 years old.  Yes, I know Romeo & Juliet where younger--but look what happened to them!! Why should their "relationship" be a standard?
• We have only known each other for about 2 months now.  How can anyone be convinced that they have found a "soul mate" in such a brief amount of time? 
• OK--Dwight and I have been "intimate." I am an 18 year old woman who has been sexually active since I was 14. . . I don't want to debate the morality of this decision.  I am responsible for my sexual health, for the health of my partner, and for my fertility. I can't help but think that Dwight is (a) feeling compelled by our culture or (b) being confused within his own male thinking that sexual attraction MUST equal love, and--therefore--he feels he has to say he "loves" me. I have told him about as much as I am telling you here, but he still insists he loves me. Do you think I am being unreasonable about this question?

And now dig what's going on this weekend: We did luxuriate this AM until late morning in bed. We headed out after he explained his vision of the weekend! We had a really nice lunch, al fresco, downtown before heading over the mountain to his school.  We got to his dorm room--well, I have to self-censor at this point--and then he left to his lab that is scheduled to run until 5 or so. . . .

When he gets back, I am supposed to be ready and we are going to have dinner, then there is a play called Romantic Fools we are going to see.  Here's the blurb about his play: "Romantic Fools is a wild comedy ride following the journey of an Everyman and Everywoman through the world of sex, romance and relationships. From a date with a caveman to Stepford husbands, Romantic Fools is a comedy for anyone who has ever loved, lusted or acted like an idiot. Drawing from influences such as Monty Python and the Mark Brothers, these sketches celebrate the inherent comedy of male-female relationships. For mature audiences."

 

OMG. .  .then there is the game tomorrow and some parties of some such stuff going on after and late into the evening. . . then he is going to get me back home sometime on Sunday since I have a mid-term math exam Monday night before our fall break starts next week!!!

HELP ME!!! Calling all cyber-friends, from Facebook to readers of my blog to any one who stumbles onto my blog. .  .what do I do to manage this whirlwind?  

And what compounds that matter is what I've listed above: he is really nice and in 10 years or so, I might be able to really consider the sort of serious relationship he is suggesting, but there is no way in hell I would ever think about telling him I love him right now. . . .

Don't hold back, dear readers!  If you think I am some heartless bitch who is using this boy, then please share your point of view so I can have something to reflect upon. . .I can tell you that I am heterosexual, and 100% committed to that chose, so don't be cute an allege that I am a lesbian and just not owned yet. . . .

So if you can help with advice, perspective, experiences, PLEASE post something in my comments area under this blog post. . . .and keep your fingers crossed for me tonight and tomorrow. . . 

Bye and love you all!